Well I was at a dragon boat buddie's stag on Friday...Yup we put him in a nurse's outfit and I bought him some flowers.

I had to cover his eyes to protect is identity...but let's just say he does work in a hosipital and there are alot of ppl see him.

So we went to his pretty kewl Japanese restraunt and there works this girl...she was caucasian and she spoke Japanese there...I was like SUGOI...I wished I was single again...

What could be more easy to pickup than a Japanese girl? A White girl who speaks Japanese! I know I know guys are PIGS...Just imagine....Ok..enuff...

We rented this school bus that was modified to be a party but...This bus has two subs and 8 speakers blasting w/music...I promised the guys whatever happens in the bus stays in the bus...I didn't want it call it the bang bus cos it was full of men for a while ;).

Anyways it was pretty CRAZZZZZY....we stopped by the "PUMP JACK", and one of the games was he could not leave until he gets a drink and a kiss from some dude.

Well he got it...It was hillarious cos the bus opens and about twenty azn guys walking out of the bus heading towards a gay bar and only one guy waks in and the rest of us staring in a window...

Anybody wanting to host a stag? Let me know...cos I have lots of CRAZZZY ideas!

Well...It was a wet new years in Chinatown...but I'm glad we did our lion dancing in doors this year. We did it in a little mall in Chinatown where as all the other Societies and clubs did theirs outside in the rain.

I did most of the directing of traffic and people in doing the lion dancing...Most of the kids hated the Masters directing them...cos they change their minds too much...I mean the masters...they're just sooo..disorginized..China style I guess...

One will tell them one thing and the other will tell them another...Too many chiefs and too many pissed indians. So I'm the man for them.

In Canada Firecrackers are illegal and a special permit is required to blow up these fire crackers. BUT in China they don't have such regulations and they don't care about the enviroment they they just go CRAZZZY durning Chinese New Years.

I've talked to my Brother In Law's wife who just came over from China and she said...It's illegal to sell the firecrackers but not to blow them up...I'm like soooo how do they get them then? She said that's totally up to you...you can make them too...

Wow...I'll make something that will blow up the shitter instead of the pieces of shit I use to blow up when I was a kid.

Happy New Year!!! Really It's the lunar new year of the Dog.

And to all the non chinese people out there this picture is a LION not a DRAGON...it's a LION!!!

A dragon is longer and is usally performed by 10-12 people where is a Lion is performed usually by 2 people.

It's like dragon boating we don't row...we PADDLE!!

And when people ask me what I'm doin new years I say Lion Dancing....And they say...so do you put on your cowboy boots and hat and have great time?

LION Dancing not LINE Dancing...oh wait...It's Dragon Dacning...Then they understand...Sigh...

Anyways I really enjoy doing this it's the most fun next to dragonboating...All the white ppl oooing and awing...

This is Dragon Dancing...

Did you wash your hair yet? It's Chinese tradition not to wash your hair on New Years day, they believe that if you do, you will wash your fortune away for the whole year.

I was going to take shower this morning, cos its not new years yet, and I saw all the conditioners all around the bath tub...How many bottles of CONDITIONER does a girl need?

I counted seven bottles of conditioner and four bottles of shampoo around the bath tub!!

It's like working in a bowling ally or building a dominos maze, trying not to knock anything down getting in to the bath tub.

All a guy needs is a conditioning shampoo...THATS IT!!

BWT Gung Xie Fa Chai or for the non chinese peeps...Gung Hay Fat Choy

Over the weekend I took Domukun out and showed him around town...I'm thinking of doing another blog..."The Memoirs of a Domokun".

I went to downtown with Sachie and my new Ecchi Tshirt and took pictures.
It was like I took him around town and showed him around. It was kinda weird a grown man with a doll walking around the busiest part of downtown filled with Japanese tourists wearing a shirt that means "Always Thinking About Sex" in Japanese.

But it was kewl we took tons of pics...Heck we took pics w/cops, and security gaurds...well not we but Domokun...

Ok I've just created it...I won't be updating this one daily but whenever tho...

http://domokunmemoirs.blogspot.com

Here's another coupon for all you movie buffs

* SOME RESTRICTIONS APPLY. Coupon only valid for adult admission ticket purchase between Tuesday January 17th, 2006 and Thursday March 30th, 2006. Valid from Monday to Thursday only. Coupon valid at any Cineplex Odeon, Famous Players or Galaxy Cinemas. Not valid with any other offer. Not valid for IMAX digitally re-mastered presentations. Limit one coupon per customer per visit. No cash value. No extensions or substitutions. Coupon must be surrendered at box office at time of purchase. ® Cineplex Entertainment LP or used under license.

This Week's coupon...Free Cheese!!

Went to vote yesterday...you know I do get that feeling that my vote will not count cos other votes just over powers you.

I mean who would not vote for the Marijuana party since all of our major political parties I think are already corupted and scandalous.

http://www.ctv.ca/generic/WebSpecials/liberal_scandal/main_frameset.html

See the Liberal Parties could be courupted by scandals, I think the Conservatives are run by American big wigs. And the NDP well they're just not enuff supporters in Canada for them to win.

Who the F*&(* would vote for the Block anyways if they didn't live in Quebec?

I knew the Conservatives would win the elections this year as a minority government.

My big debate is who should I vote for in my riding? My riding is a big NDP supporter...it was a tough decision the Marijuana or the Communist Party?

I liked the values in the Marijuana party.
http://www.marijuanaparty.com/index.en.php3

So I watched "The Memoirs of the Geshia" yesterday. No I didn't watch it on the Theaters but I bought it from a Chinese DVD place 8)...

I think I got the moral of the story is "Be nice to little girls, cos you'll never know, they might be hot when they grow up."

So why did they choose two Chinese women to be their main Geshia for this movie?

I"ve been to Japan before...Tons of cute girls every where you look...but I guess they're not as hot as Michelle Yeoh and Zhan ZiYi.

Must be cos it was a white guy who wrote the story? Don't get me wrong but why didn't a Japanese person write this story? Oh wait...Japanese people do not invent things they just make it better...

I wonder how they will make this movie better...lol...The Memoirs of an AV Geshia.

Do you guys ever read Savage Love? He's a sex expert...I mean even Dear Abby would not go into his topics.

I've learnt about Gerbilling from this guy when I was a teen. Very educational stuff...Here's what read today...

I have a sexual interest in the sounds of men using the toilet. There are several restaurants very close to my home, and I hide a wireless telephone headset in an inconspicuous place in the bathroom. I can then record, from my home, the sounds of men farting and defecating. My husband is aware of this and tolerates it, but he believes that this is unacceptable behavior, as it infringes on the privacy of others. I believe that no harm is done.

I do record the transmissions, but only for my own personal use. I don’t share them on the internet. No cameras are involved—I record audio only—and I am not interested in seeing the men I hear. Since these are public washrooms with multiple stalls, and since the sounds that any person makes there can be heard by any number of strangers, I do not feel I am invading anyone’s privacy. Lastly, the whole situation is anonymous (I have no way of identifying anyone by his noise). My husband believes that recording anyone without his permission is invasive, but my audio recordings are much less invasive than the recordings made by the restaurant’s security cameras. However, I have agreed that I will turn all my recording equipment over to my husband if you think what I do is wrong.

- PITCHING HEADSETS AND RETIRING TELEPHONES

Then a light switch turned on...hey a Niche! CD Recordings in 5.1 stero sournd sound of me in the John!

Who said you can't make a living doing the things that you enjoy!!!

Warning this may contain graphic images that may not be suited for all audience!

Smoking like a chimney. Not here in Canada anymore, but other countries, Asain and some European countries.

He had two homestay student who smoked and this new one she smokes. Don't they know smoking is bad for them?

We try and educate them..but it's too late they love smoking and they're adicted to it.

Wait til they start buying the smokes here in Canada...yup the ones with the black lungs on the front of the smokes.

They'll wish they had bough more smokes from Japan or Korea..muhaha..hahaha

I need a smoke...


Thank God they don't post pics of
"Warning Driving without a seat belt will cause brains splattering all over the windshield."

Or "Warning Eating Too Much MSG in Chinese Food Will cause shrinkage"

Well we're getting a new student at our place today.

For the last year we've been getting Japanese students at our place and today a Korean student is coming to live with us.

It'll be kinda weird not having Japanese, cos I can speak a bit of Japanese, and now I'm gonna try and learn Korean.

There are some similarity in the languages, Chinese, Korean and Japanese. Some of the older style (Kanji) writing are the same. It's cos we were all of the same decent most of the Japanese and Korean people were from China.

Now I know there will be a huge debate on this but how else can you explain the Kanji and Korea in writing it means "Han Country". Han is Chinese for Chinese.

I've seen a historic movie and it's true history that during the Ching or Qin dynasty was ruled by a most feared emperor and he had the people build the Great Wall of China to protect China from the Mongols.

The Emperor was determined to look for the fountan of youth that he had heard about. He had send 1000 people to the south and 1000 people to the north to look for this fountain of youth.

He had told them if you don't come back with the fountain of youth you and all of your family will DIE. It was no use to threaten them by chopping their penis' off becuase they were all eunuch's anyways.

So all the people who went to the north discovered Korea and stayed there and all the peeps who went to the south found Japan and stayed there. And there they grew...

Believe it or not!

Whao...WTF happened to my blog? Stupid word wrap..

Here's this week coupon...I don't think it's worth it tho...

Vancouver BC = Rain Capital of Canada. We complain when there is too much rain, we complain when there isn't enough rain.

We were one day short for our record of having the most rain consecutivly 27days. Last time it rain that much was 53 years ago.

http://www.thestar.com/NASApp/cs/ContentServer?pagename=thestar/Layout/Article_Type1&c=Article&pubid=968163964505&cid=1137411250310&col=968705899037&call_page=TS_News&call_pageid=968332188492&call_pagepath=News/News

Yup it rained for 26 days. I enjoyed the 27th day...Blew the dust off my brand new sunglasses and went for a walk around Vancouver.

In the summer time we're not allowed to water our lawns...WTF? How can Vancouver run out of water? We ARE the RAIN CAPITAL of Canada.

I don't get it... And the Gov is thinking of charging us for water usage. WHY? We have the best tasting water out there...

http://www.berkeleysprings.com/water/awards.htm

I can see places like Toronto or places where they do not have an abundant water supply sure...move to BC and help to pay for our taxes...

I only feel safe drinking out of the tap when I'm in Vancouver...I tried doing that in Ottawa...Blech...I swear we were in Swiss Challet and I asked for a glass of ice water...Tasted like someone had sucked the water out of the hose and spat it in my cup...

When I was in Philly...the Coke...I can taste the clay in the Coke...blech...I can't beleive it I paid for a can of clay and Coke...I dare not to even touch some of the bottled water in China...

Why don't we tax the water that is getting sent out of our Province? Or the peeps who buy our waters...

The Rich gets richer and the poor get poorer and the middle income gets screwed...sigh.

Thanks to Sachie coming back from Japan...She got me not one but two DOMOKUNS!!

These two and they're kewl as heck...

Steve got one too when he found out that I got one...What a copy cat...but Sachie got him a basic Domokun.

Tell me does Domo-kun eat cats? Cos my canadian firends tell me they eat cats and the Japanese peeps say he doesn't.

You tell me..

This morning I saw some chinese dude with a pink plastic umbrella running across the street. DUDE you stole your daughters umbrella. I can picture her all drentched at school and crying cos her father stole her umbrella.

Why do Chinese people do stupid ugly ass shit like that? There was once I saw a grown chinese man riding a pink strawberry shortcake bike, and he was riding it w/his kids. His kids had normal bikes, I think his kids are MEAN!! I would of told my dad to get the F&*k off that bike cos it's my SISTERs!!

My dad does does ugly ass stupid things too...I dunno I think it's their China mentality.... Whatever is cheap and works...

My dad build a awning out of a glass shower door...He build a garden out of ton of video cables and pieces of scrap tin. UGLY UGLY ASS SHIT.

I'm telling him not to touch our place...don't make any fancy ugly ass shit for my new place...cos he put a big sharpie pen marks on our garage w/our addy on it...UGLY UGLY ASS SHIT....

There's this restraunt around our area and it was a pretty neutral color place...but it's now PINK!!! Who in their right mind would paint their restraunt business PINK!!! Yup it's a Chinese restraunt. Ugly Ass Shit...

Whatever is cheap and works I guess...

Comments, please feel free to leave them...

This Blog entry is dedicated to the memory of my brand new never been used BBQ.

My buddies bought me this BBQ for my house warming and never been used. So I went to buy a chain for fifty bucks to lock down so that no one can steel it.

Well it's gone now. I'm choked cos I spent fifty bucks on a lock and chain...and now I only have a lock...and the bbq I've never even turned it on. Not a single slab of meat has even touch it.

Well this is my charitible donation of the year. I still have my charcoal one kicking around. I'll wait till I get another house...and buy a huge ass one so they can't get it out the door of my gate and it'll make a big rumbling noise when they roll it down the block.

I feel a wave of bad luck coming again...It just happens every so often when not one thing but a whole shit load of bad luck...It's like either God or the devil sees "Oh, Mike's life has been pretty good...let's fuck it up for him."

Last time a wave of bad luck came was about three years ago...Then it had stopped for about a year or two...

Let me tell you what happened last time...

1. Got Married (it's not the getting married part...it's all the behind the scene part.)
2. House - hired the contractor from hell and was two years over due in buidling the frickin house.
2a. Becasue of the Contractor many leagal issues with lawyers
3. Mom got cancer
4. Wife's grandmom had a stroke infront of us twice
5. Wife's grandfather got cancer
6. Work was extremely stressful 5am-6pm working
7. Averaged 2-3hrs sleep a day
8. Wife's father died
9. Found out I had diabetes

And I'm sure there's more that happened in those two long ass years.

I have a feeling it's all starting again...

1. Mom is going for surgey...she's not telling me yet
2. Someone stole our BBQ yesterday...Brandnew for house warming that buddies had bought for me never been used
3. The ceiling lis leaking in our new place
4. Demotion instead of a promotion

What's next? I won't be able to have kids? Bring it on! I'm ready for another year or two of shit.

So... I'm still Workleader... until the end of the month... Sigh... I kinda enjoyed it cos I was able to tell people what to do and not hafta deal with the customers, just the peeps who hafta deal with the cusotmers. It's not I did a bad job...it's they need me to do technical work cos I'm too good technically.

I have a feeling I'm never gonna get out of this pot-hole.

I guess I'll need to refund all my Mexx and AE shirts that I've bought over the boxing day shopping....Naw...I'll keep them for my job interviews when I'm looking for other jobs. 8)

Here's the note from the manager

Hi Folks,

Firstly, I wanted to thank Michael Chau for really stepping up to the work leader role. Mike has been a real help to me when he covered for Wayne in the past and especially at this time since Wayne has left. I think he’s shown his ability to lead under a heavy volume (and stressful?) period and I appreciate his strength in that.

One of the initiatives that ITO has on it’s objectives for this year is to create more opportunity for Job Rotations. I looked at Wayne’s departure as a potential opportunity for us to try this out. I met with George and the other EUO managers to see what we could do to create a job rotation and to discuss who might be a good candidate. We wanted to provide a new opportunity for someone, but at the same time to try to create some synergy between teams.

The person we selected for this opportunity is Clint. Clint will perform the role of Edmonds Onsite work leader for the next 6 months. In this role, Clint will definitely bring some good customer knowledge to our team, while at the same time help to strengthen the relationship between us and the Help Desk. Clint’s excited by this opportunity and I’m certain he will work hard to make this a good experience for us all. Desiree will obviously replace Clint and will likely announce that in the near future.

I hope you welcome Clint to this position. I also hope you see this as a positive (as I do) in that we are looking at job rotations as a potential development and training initiative. I am committed to providing rotational opportunities for any staff who are interested and where we can set something up.

Clint will be joining us on January 30. Thanks!

Blah blah blah and he's got a big dick and he's white and he wears knee pads to work...

7 Things Tag

7 Things Tag

Winger Jones has just tagged me to have a go at listing 7 things from the following categories...so here goes.

7 Things to do before I die

Be Japanese AV star
Goto Egypt
Standup Comedy
Live with the Bums for a week
Try Snake and Dog at China
Goto Disney World and Rack up on my Credit Card
Tell my boss to Fuck himself/herself

7 Things I cannot do

Snowboard
Be in Gay porn
Stand noise
Swim
Live in India
Be alone for long peirod of time
Be without internet

7 Things that attract me to blogging

See others viewing my blog
I can be myself
Possibilities
Chance to show off
Chance to be confessional
Keep in contact w/others who I do not keep in contact with
To have my own and to share other peoples 15 minutes.

7 Things I say most often

Shit
What The?
Hmmmm...
Uhhh...Yeah
Yeeeaaahhhhhh....
Shut Up!
Don't you get it?

7 books I love

Gee...I gotta remember the books I've read in highschool...

Dan Brown - The Davinci's Code
Julie Moffett - Light a Single Candle
John Wyndham - The Chrysalids
Sue Townsend - The Secret Diary of Adrian Mole
SE Hilton - That was then this is now
Jay Anson - The Amityville Horror
Any Exorcism non fiction books

7 Movies or TV Series I watch or would watch over & over again

Alias
Simpsons
Family Guy
STNG
Warren Chapelle Show
Mr Bean
The King of Queens

7 bloggers who I'd like to have a go at this
(no pressure, if you can be bothered)

Mer Boo
George Low
Kagemusha
All the rest of the Chau bloggers
And You who's reading this who and has a blog
I don't know too many others who blog...

This weeks freebie at Superstore...

Work is okay...it's just waking up for work that sucks. I had to drag myself off the bed this morning.

I woke up...I must of sat on my bed for atleast 20minutes before I got out of my warm blanket. I can hear the pouring rain out side and just want to fall back into sleep.

Getting the wife off the bed is even worse...

Why do girls sleep soo much? Sometimes I get about four or five hours of sleep and I just can't sleep anymore so I do stuff.

But the wife (my mom, and other buddies wives are all the same) they just sleep, sleep, sleep hours on end and still do not get enough sleep.

Are they charging up to get angry at their men? Cos I know it takes a lot of engery from me when the wife nag and complain about everything that I do. Like a cordless phone the bed is their charging station.

I wish I worked at home sometimes so I can sleep anytime I want and when I want. But it's tragic when the rich becomes richer and the poor becomes poorer and the middle income well they just get screwed.

Oopoops I did it again...I farted in the car...man I had to get out fast from my car...I had roast chicken and some funky chinese noodles yesterday nite...It was bad enough to make myself cringe.

So I decided to sit in the shitter and let it all out...Next thing I heard someone coming in then the next thing I heard was keys jinling on his side...

I'm like oh shit it the janitor...he's gonna take a while to clean the place up...then I though oh shit...any toliet paper? Yup phew...

The next thing I heard was a little Murmur from him...Hmmmhmm...He changes the toliet paper in the stall next to mine then he quickly rushes out the door...just when the door shuts I hear..."WOW".

I got him! HAHAHAHAR!! He comes in and out of the washroom several times to get a breather from cleaning...Every two minutes or so...I didn't want to get out of the can cos I didn't want him to know who it was making the shit soup in the can...

I left the can when it was safe and I didn't hear anyone else...TGIF

So on New Years Eve we took the BIL's (Brother-In-Law) Wife for a New Years Eve night cruise on the.....Sea Bus.

Well the cost was the right price...it Free after 5PM...So we went to the Lonsdale Quay and did a senenic walk around the peir then went back cos it was too cold.

To celebrate New Years my wife and I went over to a buddies to play poker $1 buy in...no it is not a typo...yes a buck...it was more for fun cos there were kids there.

Then when the New Year came in we just drank fake wine. It was cool...

So...my dad want's me to build an apartment.

Well not here in Vancouver that would be freaking expensive, it's out in China.

You see my dad and his brother has a place out in China. In China the land is owned by the government and now China is getting more crowded, the government wants to take back some land.

Well both my uncle and my dad wants to keep the land and the only way to do this is to build a freaking place on top of the free space.

Well you see my dad is cheap. He wants me to put in the money. How much does it cost to build a six storey apt? Well let's just say less than $100K CAD.

But to collect rent it's too freaking cheap. It's about 100RBM a month per aprtment...that's about $20 CAD. We're thinking of building building six floors with two or three apartments on each floor.

But of course I want a whole condo to myself. My uncle is cheap too...so I hafta becareful.

I know what most of you are thinking...Haven't you learnt from building your own house? Yet building an aprtment in a forgein country? I know I know...But my wife's sister in law's dad is a builder there...hopfully it won't be as bad.

Whatever!!

Here's a coupon for free toliet paper if you purchase $50 or more...Why are Chinese people obsesed with toliet paper?

Just click on it and print it out. Expires Jan 6th 2005

Check my blog out weekly for more coupons...

Well start of a new year...I've started on my diet...my no AYCE sushi, fast, fried food diet. How long is it gonna last? Well probs until Dboating season is over.

I need to get back to Dragonboating shape. I really let myself go this Winter.

I have a buddy who is getting married this April also, he whipped himself into shape for my wedding as my best man, so I guess I'll do the same since I'm one of his grooms men.

Well my goal is 20lbs in four months. Gotta hit the gym...They say (who the heck is they anyways) 80% of the people who made New Years Resolutions to hit the gym will stop by the mid of January. I'm usually pretty good with the gym it's the eating part that I have problems with.

Any how lots to update...I'll do that within the week...TTYL!!